No one gets married with the assumption that they’ll someday divorce their spouse. In fact, divorce can often feel like a tragedy, as no one wants to watch their marriage fall apart.
However, divorce happens. Sometimes couples are happier apart than they are together. But even if the divorcing couple is making the right choice, sometimes divorce can bring out people’s ugly sides. All family law attorneys in Orange Co have stories about divorcing spouses who became extremely nasty and combative during their divorce proceedings.
You don’t have to turn into a negative person just because you’re going through a divorce. Here’s how to be your best self while going through a divorce.
Think Before You Speak
Divorce can bring out a lot of negative emotions, such as anger, sadness and guilt. When we feel like we’re drowning under the weight of these negative emotions, we often lash out at the people around us. Many divorcing spouses will find themselves posting angry rants on social media or badmouthing their former partner to their children. This is why it’s so important to remind yourself to think before you speak. When you feel like you’re about to act out in anger, pause and take a deep breath.
Don’t Try To “Punish” Your Ex
If you enter mediation or court with the goal of “punishing” your ex, you’re going to end up disappointed. Judges rarely reward individuals who are clearly trying to get back at their ex or get revenge for what they consider to have been bad behavior in the marriage. In a divorce, your goal should be to get what you’re entitled to and nothing more. The goal of a divorce proceeding is to ensure that both parties receive what’s fair to them.